Most of my practice is made up of women and this began right from the start as an intern in my last year at naturopathic medical school. This was not the exception but the norm for interns and the trend continues today in our practices.
Do woman care more about their health then men? Are men just out of touch with their bodies? Consider the following:
“22 % of men say they have not been for a checkup in at least five years. Men have to be on their deathbeds before they’ll make the dreaded trip.” ~Dr. Mel Borins, M.D
My practice is made up of 85% woman and typically it is girlfriends and wives dragging in their boyfriends or husbands to come in and see me.
Why is this happening? First and foremost, our society is mainly built on reactionary attitudes, we don’t act until something is blatantly wrong or symptoms reach a point that can’t be ignored. Unfortunately the situation for men is compounded and it began with a killer attitude that started when we were young.
Personally, when I was in kindergarden my nickname was “pout pout machine”, a name I hated or at least grew into hating. Ironically, it was not the other kids in my class who gave me the name but my teacher! She used to say things like “big boys don’t cry” and “boys are supposed to be tough”. I was a sensitive kid until in grade 5 when I fought and to my shame, completely pummeled another boy. The other kids cheered and put me on their shoulders in celebration. My chest had swelled with pride, forever losing the hated nickname I had to bare for the last 5 years, an eternity for a child. I was now fully on my way to my killer attitude, my manhood thinking, I’m tough! I don’t need help, I’ll take care of it myself thank you very much.
Throughout my teenage years I ended up in competitive sports, lots of it. You name it, I played it. In competitive sports “you play through the pain” or you “ride the pine” (sit on the bench). Insert reinforcement of my manly psyche, I’m tough! These are of course my personal experiences, however there are many aspects where our male gender is programed by society into this killer attitude. It starts early, often and happens to most.
You might recognize the attitude, I don’t need help, I’m tough! I don’t need to see the doctor, I’m tough! I need to be the rock for others, I’m tough! I can’t let others know that I’m suffering or that I’m weak, I’m tough! I’m not a pout-pout machine!
So what can we do? We need to understand that we as a society played a major part in creating this attitude. We need to be understanding, forgiving and gentle. Speak to our egos, tell us it takes courage to have a prostate exam! Who can argue against that? Tell us it takes strength to admit that we are vulnerable and sometimes we need help. Most important-without out judgement- tell us that you care and that taking action in preventing illness is the most manly thing we can do! How can we take care of our families if we are not around? How else are we going to keep our bodies in top form, to be the Adonis’ we are? Moustache and all!
Dr. Derek Cook Naturopathic Doctor
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